Monday October 9, 2006: I'm scared of love; I’m scared to have someone love me. To me when someone loves you it means its really serious an sure I do love serious relationships but I don't know what I would do if someone proposed to me or broke off the relationship because life wouldn’t be so fun but I won't be so down in life I’ll still continue to enjoy what I have left.
I get a message from the guy I’m dating saying that he wants to end it and that its not working... not working on his end... well I’m not sure...he just felt bad because he wasn't spending too much time with me an that well he's moving in December an he doesn’t want to hurt me even more when he does move away... I get that part but I liked what him and I had because I didn’t have to ask for space I automatically had it...
So when that happened I asked for him to meet up with me tonight because I wanted to see him one last time...
Sitting in the passengers seat of my car he pulls up walks up to my car I unlock the doors instead of getting out he walks around open up the drivers side an jumps in. he starts to be all cutesy an then of course I have to bring up my feet being sore because of running around the church backwards bear foot.... so I got out of the car an just walked out towards a picnic table an sat down, he later joins me... an we just sit there he starts doing his cutesiness (not a word I know)
Then I go to hug him because I just wanted to be close to him for awhile longer before we went our separate ways, I pull away an look at him, he returns the look an then he kisses me....
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